The Knock-Out and the Look
Day 7 - It's 10.31pm and I have another 29 minutes to go here. No, I'm not in control of my own schedule since I agreed to wake up Michelle at 11pm in order to feed Lian. Am I happy about this? No. But as I sit here reminiscing about the days not so long ago when I could go to sleep whenever I wanted to (sounds strange, doesn't it? not being able to go to sleep when you want to), I'm not that bothered. Why? Because in the past few days, Michelle and I have discovered two things about Lian that make us melt. I call these the Knock-Out and the Look. The former mostly happens during the day, the latter mostly at night. And I expect that I'll be treated to the latter very shortly.
Picture George Foreman in Zaire against Ali in 1974. Better yet, Joe Louis in 1937 getting the heavyweight title from James Braddock. Braddock was knocked out in the 8th round. Braddock was on the mat, nearly comatose. That is the pose Lian does right after she finishes feeding.
Unlike the boxers in the analogy - Lian's Knock-Out pose is one of the most touching and beautiful I’ve ever seen. After every feeding during the day, right after Michelle has just broken the suction of her little girl's mouth against her nipple, Lian will roll slowly away until she's on her back on the bed or on Michelle's lap, her arms limp, her mouth open, her eyes closed. It's her version of the Knock-Out. And in that pose, Michelle will hold Lian against her after every feeding. Michelle will stay still sometimes for 15 minutes at a time, not letting me burp her or change her, for fear of waking her up out of that blissful state - the milk coma she calls it.
At night, our little girl seems to be alert more than asleep after feeding. In fact, I’m expecting to see her wide awake in another half hour once she’s finished her 11pm feeding. What she does when she finishes feeding at night is what melts me: she opens her eyes wide, looks around from right to left in your arms as you’re holding her, and then slowly, her eyes will wander until they find yours. That moment when her dark colorless eyes latch onto mine, her little mouth opened in a lazy “o”, her fingers and arms working slowly as if in a slow motion un-choreographed ballet, makes my heart skip a beat. I find myself breathing deeply as I think about that moment right now. Time literally stands still in that moment of the Look.
Colorless eyes, you ask? Yes, I didn't know this but apparently most babies' eyes are blue on birth because the brown pigment molecule Melanin which colors our skin, hair and eyes, doesn't color the iris upon birth, and only stabilizes at around 6 months of age. Well, to be honest, I can't really tell Lian's color - it's a deep dark ebony right now that I see staring back at me. I hope her Look never changes. One of the most beautiful faces I've ever seen in a human being.
The Knock-Out
Picture George Foreman in Zaire against Ali in 1974. Better yet, Joe Louis in 1937 getting the heavyweight title from James Braddock. Braddock was knocked out in the 8th round. Braddock was on the mat, nearly comatose. That is the pose Lian does right after she finishes feeding.
Unlike the boxers in the analogy - Lian's Knock-Out pose is one of the most touching and beautiful I’ve ever seen. After every feeding during the day, right after Michelle has just broken the suction of her little girl's mouth against her nipple, Lian will roll slowly away until she's on her back on the bed or on Michelle's lap, her arms limp, her mouth open, her eyes closed. It's her version of the Knock-Out. And in that pose, Michelle will hold Lian against her after every feeding. Michelle will stay still sometimes for 15 minutes at a time, not letting me burp her or change her, for fear of waking her up out of that blissful state - the milk coma she calls it.
At night, our little girl seems to be alert more than asleep after feeding. In fact, I’m expecting to see her wide awake in another half hour once she’s finished her 11pm feeding. What she does when she finishes feeding at night is what melts me: she opens her eyes wide, looks around from right to left in your arms as you’re holding her, and then slowly, her eyes will wander until they find yours. That moment when her dark colorless eyes latch onto mine, her little mouth opened in a lazy “o”, her fingers and arms working slowly as if in a slow motion un-choreographed ballet, makes my heart skip a beat. I find myself breathing deeply as I think about that moment right now. Time literally stands still in that moment of the Look.
Colorless eyes, you ask? Yes, I didn't know this but apparently most babies' eyes are blue on birth because the brown pigment molecule Melanin which colors our skin, hair and eyes, doesn't color the iris upon birth, and only stabilizes at around 6 months of age. Well, to be honest, I can't really tell Lian's color - it's a deep dark ebony right now that I see staring back at me. I hope her Look never changes. One of the most beautiful faces I've ever seen in a human being.
The Knock-Out
posted by Note Buyer at 10:31 PM
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